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The Ghoulish Guidance Archive
Pet Peeves
Dear Spiffy,
A buddy and I have made a wager and we need your advice. Who would win in a fight: the evil zombie cat from PET SEMATARY or Cujo?
Ruv,
-Rassie
Dear Doggie Daddy,
Woof! Wah-wah-woo!™
-Spiffy
TRANSLATION:
Dear Rassie,
I gotta give props to the rabid dog. While the zombie cat was vile and menacing, Cujo woulda kicked his mangy, dead ass to the curb. "How can you be so sure," you ask? I ran the scenario in my Mattel Scary Stephen King Pets Death-Match Simulator® and that's the answer it gave me. Those things are never wrong. Any more questions?
-Spiffy
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